Natural Beauty

By: Janet M. Norman

I was driving to church this evening and God provided the most incredible sunset. I was only getting glimpses of it through trees and over rooftops, and the colors He painted on our sky canvas was shades of orange, pink, and purple. The blue backdrop and floating puffy clouds took my breath away. I wanted to be at the beach, but I was on my way to worship my Savior. 

My husband and I took many opportunities to go to the beach at various times, dates, and places. Our first kiss was on a beach. I still remember the warmth of the sun and sand in my toes as I laid back on blanket. With my eyes still closed, I felt a shadow come across my face. Then his soft warm lips gently pressed upon mine and literally, in that moment, we had instant chemistry. I was swept up in the moment, and I treasure it in my heart as one of the most precious gifts I possess. 

When we look around the world, God is in the natural beauty. Jason and I loved being outdoors. We took a walk with our sons and dog after dinner every evening. Even as our sons became teenagers, they still enjoyed walking with us. People in our neighborhood knew us as the family that worked out together. Those too are precious memories I hold dear in my heart.  There is something so refreshing about taking long deep breaths outside.

How does this tie into widowhood? Well, as a grieving person, it’s super important to find something that brings you joy. For me, my happiest memories with my beautiful husband were spent outside. I take comfort in the things my husband and I did together. Our goal was to retire and pretend we were

ten together. We planned on riding bikes and hiking all over Colorado and even the Appalachian Trail. God had a different plan and even though it’s hard on me and my sons, I trust His plan is the best plan. 

Grievers are on their own timelines. Their is no right or wrong way to grieve. Friends and family members need to honor the widow or widower. They need to be gentle and most of all patient and try to get the person back to doing something that can bring a smile to their face. Not everyone is the same though. Communication is key. That’s why a text, message, visit, or even better a phone call is critical to keep the connection alive. The more time that passes with no communication, the harder it is for the griever to step back into functioning society and even feel welcomed back to society. 

People have a way of looking differently at a griever too. People may put their hand on the griever’s shoulder and say something like, “How are you doing? Are you okay?” Imagine if people said that to you over and over and over and over. It’s weird. I felt like half of my body and soul was ripped off of me when my Jason went home to Jesus. Suddenly the whole was torn to half. Learning to cope with these new emotions truly takes TIME. Some adapt quicker than others, but learning to find the new you will take a painstaking introspection of your desires. 

As you watch your next sunrise or sunset, take note it was designed and created just for you by a loving heavenly Father. You are a part of a joyful hike. You are connected. We are connected to each other and our natural world. Just take it one step at a time.